another day

I can't believe that my day has already ended just like that. I don't really know how i am feeling right now. I have Michael Buble playing my favourite song but instead of cheering me up it doesn't seem to have any effect on me tonight. Not like yesterday. I find that the more i listened to the songs the more i want to break down.

Walking on my own two feet will take a lot of "getting used" to and all the time wondering when this would end or when would everything be alright. Its a sickening feeling that i have to bear. Today i found myself constantly finding some thing to do to keep myself occupied so that i wouldn't suddenly burst into tears. Michael.. oh Michael.. why isn't your songs working for me tonight. I just feel horrible now.

I miss the moments. I miss not being able to wake up in the mornings and have a purpose to start the day. I miss not being able to say see you soon and not good bye. I miss not being able to just there and not do anything. I miss most is Andrew. I wish we all had our very own personal time keeper and a machine to go back just once to save ourselves in the past from making the mistake. But if had saved ourselves from this... would we be the same person we are today? Would all this be going on from that point of change? Would i really be sitting here now writing this.

I'm sorry Michael, your songs tonight just don't bring any happiness to me.